Christmas Wish
by Emeldir aka Finduilas
Summary: Lily makes a wish before going to sleep on Christmas Eve, a wish for her future. When she wakes up nothing is the same...
1. Twas the Night Before Christmas

Disclaimer: As I'm sure you already know; I own absolutely nothing, nada, inkongolo (that's Zulu for those who are wondering), niks (Afrikaans), procedes to ramble off in about fourteen different languages. You get the picture. It all belongs to JK Rowling and I'm just using some of the canon in my own story.

Seventeen-year-old Lily Evans shut her eyes tightly as she tried to get to sleep. She felt rather silly; being so excited for Christmas the next day. Her room in 15 Greenbird Road was dark and quiet.

She was quivering with nervous energy; she couldn't sleep. She stood up and walked to her window. It was open and as she looked out into the starry night sky she saw snow frosting her family's tiny garden. The breeze that swept her auburn hair over her shoulders was cold and made her emerald eyes water.

She gazed out; wishing that time would speed up so that Christmas would come! She had always loved Christmas, with the beautiful lights and all the presents. She loved the story about what had happened so many years ago on Christmas Day. She loved sharing with her family on that day, even her rude elder sister, Petunia.

Through all the celebration Lily always felt that there was something missing and only last year she had been mature enough to realize what: true love. She had her i family /i love but what Lily wanted more than anything else was to have a husband one day and a family of her own that she could share Christmas with.

Christmas here was great but Lily knew it wasn't all natural. Her parents genuinely loved her and Petunia but the two girls were so different that it strained their holidays making them feel forced. Petunia openly insulted Lily and called her names.

Lily ignored her, convincing herself that Petunia was just jealous of Lily's own skills as a witch but as time wore on it was becoming harder for her to think that way. She could still recall the days before the Letter. Those days the sisters had been friends although not at all close friends. After the Letter inviting her to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry had come Petunia had immediately become a source of discouragement and insults, always insisting that magic was unnatural and wrong. She never let an opportunity to hurt Lily go by.

'And this Christmas will be terrible,' Lily realized. 'She's bringing her boyfriend here!' Lily had only met her sister's boyfriend once but that was more than enough to make her dislike him. He hated anything "abnormal" which meant that he despised Lily. He sneered at her and constantly told Petunia that it wasn't her fault that she had such a i strange /i sister. He also told Petunia not to worry because "people of i that /i sort were bound to come to a bad end".

Lily scowled at the memory. She had seen him about a few months ago, about a week before going to school. She could clearly picture his huge black moustache and remembered how big and fat he was next to thin, bony Petunia. Her blond hair and horsey teeth looked strange with her long neck but she was pretty in her own way. Her boyfriend's name was Vernon Dursley and he was a very short-tempered man who was rather greedy.

'Maybe next year,' she thought with a smile. She was in her last year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and she was Head Girl. Next year she would be starting her job. 'I wonder who I'll be with next Christmas?' She daydreamed for about five minutes. 'I know that my husband will be perfect but I wish I knew him now!' As she thought this a shooting star (A/N: the proper name for it is bolide) shot across the night sky; tearing the velvet black in two. She smiled, 'it could be anyone,' she reasoned, 'anyone except Potter or Black at least.' She grimaced, thinking of the two boys.

James Potter and Sirius Black were the school's biggest pranksters. They were both in her year and both belonged to a mischievous group called the Marauders that they had helped found along with Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew. 'Check that,' Lily thought, 'it could be anyone but Potter, Black and i Pettigrew /i .'

Black was tall and a really flirty. He was quite smart and for some reason had been nicknamed "Padfoot" by the other Marauders. Peter was short and chubby and not too bright, he was nicknamed "Wormtail". Remus was the most studious of the group although James achieved better marks. Remus' nickname was "Moony".

James Potter was the Quidditch Captain and one of the Chasers in their school house, Gryffindor's Quidditch team. He was popular and had messy black hair with hazel eyes. His nickname was "Prongs." He was also Head Boy which meant Lily had to work with him far more often than she liked. Why he was Head Boy was beyond Lily because although he was smart and excelled in Transfiguration he was always on detention and rather arrogant. 'But he has been a little better this year,' a small voice in her head reminded her. Lily shook the thought away. No, he was still the same pompous Potter he had always been, wasn't he?

She sighed and walked back to her bed. She stared around her small room. Her family was quite poor but she still had her own private room and her parents had saved enough for her to go to Hogwarts. She didn't want them to feel that it was a waste so she always did her best in school and tried to choose cheaper clothes and cheap things to eat or use for herself. She knew that she wouldn't get a lot of presents this year, she never did but she also knew that what she was given was given to her with love so she appreciated all of it.

The room had peeling pink wallpaper and flimsy curtains. A plush rabbit with it's stuffing coming out lay on the floor and a spotless secondhand birdcage stood open waiting for her owl, Muppet's return. Her quills and parchment were packed neatly in her trunk and a textbook lay open on a rickety side table. Her room was bare otherwise and as she snuggled under her thin and ratty lilac blanket she felt a pang of loneliness. She wished that the room was more elegant; she felt embarassed to invite friends over sometimes because she was worried they'd pity her. Lily hated pity.

Her sister gave a grunting snore from the room across the hall. Typical Petunia. How could she not be excited the day before Christmas?

Lily rolled over, facing away from her window. The bed squeaked as she moved. Her pink teddy bear pyjamas felt tight around her; they were a size too small. 'I wonder where Muppet is? She should be back by now!' Lily needed her to get her friends' presents to them. Lily snuggled down in her cover and decided not to worry, after all; tomorrow was a new day. Christmas Day and she would still be there in the morning and ready to send the gifts.

This is my first fanfic so plz send reviews! I don't mind flames just no bad language plz!! : D


	2. Merry Christmas?

How did I leave this out? **Bangs head against wall. **I really don't understand computers.

The sun was shining brightly against Lily's eyelids. Groaning she rolled over onto her other side and yawned. Her pyjamas felt comfortably loose and airy around her. She snuggled underneath the comforter; it felt much warmer in bed than usual since she normally woke up shivering during the winter. It felt as though she was in her four-poster bed in the Hogwarts girls' dormitory. 'But I'm not' she told herself firmly, 'I'm in my own bed in 15 Greenbird Road'. The sunshine was weak but it made her groan 'I must have left my curtains open again,' she thought.

'It's Christmas'. The thought came so quickly and she was surprised she hadn't thought of it before. Something felt different though and so she cautiously and sleepily opened one eyelid. She was immediately fully awake.

Her eyes travelled over her surroundings. They were completely unfamiliar. She saw an enormous mahogany cupboard standing proudly in one corner. It was ajar and inside a full-length mirror could be seen. The other side of the room supported a big and ornately carved chest of drawers, also polished mahogany. Both had robes draped over them neatly and the cupboard had a fair number of muggle clothes like dresses, jeans and shirts inside it.

Lily began to enjoy just looking and she almost forgot to panic. Almost. The room was large and tastefully decorated with sleek wooden panelling and dark peach paint on the walls. The ceiling was supported with strong varnished oak beams and although the room was completely clean it still had a lived in and homely feeling. A wreath was hung up over the door and glancing up Lily could see mistletoe...

It was then that Lily remembered her predicament and started feeling nervous again. 'Maybe it's all a dream and I'll wake up soon and be snug at home again'. She didn't think so though, why did it seems so real then? The thick cream-coloured comforter slid off her shoulders as she sat up. As she looked down she saw a rumpled purple pyjama top that read "My Lily". 'This is a dream', she thought sternly and promptly lay down again and put the covers over her face. 'Muppet will come in any second now and start pecking me awake.'

She felt a bit scared when about five minutes went by with nothing happening. She only heard a soft noise like a person taking gentle deep breaths. 'But it can't be,' she thought, 'who else could be in here?'

Then a nasty thought struck her, 'What if I was kidnapped? And now they're going to hold me for ransom?' But she didn't believe that. She knew that there must be a reasonable explanation because she was a very light sleeper and she was sure nobody had moved her while she was asleep because she hadn't woken up. Besides, there was a certain peace about the place, almost... Lily blinked, dare she think it?

It was the atmosphere she had so long hoped for while living with her parents. The thing she had wanted most for Christmas; the feeling that she was cherished and loved by someone who wanted her more than anyone else.

She peeked out from under the blanket again and gasped as she looked at the calendar. Instead of familiar "1977" the calendar read "1979". Now she knew what had happened. She was a smart witch and had a good memory. She remembered her wish from last night and she knew it had come true. A Christmas with her husband and maybe children.

She heard a yawn from the other edge of the queen sized bed and she stiffened. It seemed almost familiar... She shook her head slightly and turned to look at the noise's source. He (or it) was covered by the comforter. She stood up and tip-toed to his edge of the bed. Cautiously, she reached for a corner of the blanket and flung the cover off of him.

LOL, I luv cliffhangers. Plz review!!!


	3. Who I Am

Thanks to all the reviewers! Sorry I didn't reply sooner. If you want me to reply please tell me.

Fille-chica143 No offence taken. I know what a prude is and, yes, I think you would probably call me one. It depends... LOL.

Dani Necho Yes!

Bubbles What do we do? We swim, swim...

Kim Kotchanski You'll see. (Gollum voice) You will see...

Beyonce-85 No, never watched that.

Kiwiknight Not yet. Maybe later.

Lily screamed as the covers were thrown off the bed to reveal a young man with messy black hair.

"What is it, Lily?" he asked her sleepily. He yawned and then he brightened, his mischievous hazel eyes twinkling; "I remember now; Merry Christmas!"

He got up and threw his well-muscled arms around her. He was wearing only his boxers...

"Get off me!" Lily shrieked indignantly, pushing his strong arms away.

He reached out and touched he cheek, "Are you all right, Angel?" his voice was soft and he sounded concerned. Lily didn't care.

"I know who you are!" she gasped, partly in fear and partly in relief that she was not facing a total stranger, as she recognized him, "Potter," she hissed through clenched teeth, her emerald eyes narrowed and her body tense.

"You needn't sound so surprised, you know me better than anyone else, remember?" The concern was back on James' face as he asked, "What is it, Angel?"

"My name isn't Angel, Potter. It's Lily, Lily Evans," she spat angrily, scowling at him.

"Evans? You haven't been Evans for about a year and a half," he looked partly surprised and partly amused at her outburst.

The colour drained from Lily's already pale face and this time she didn't pull away when he lifted her limp left hand and kissed it gently.

She saw a huge diamond circled by a few tiny emeralds glittering on her ring finger.

"No Angel," he grinned and looked up into her face, "you're Lily Potter."

Lily's sinking heart reached the bottom of her stomach. She blinked back a flood of tears. She had known deep inside her heart as soon as she had seen James what the truth was about her future but she had been denying it; telling herself it just couldn't be true.

"No," she whispered, pulling her small hand from his warmer and larger one and sobbing she ran from the room.

She stumbled twice, nearly blinded by her own hot tears. They ran down her cheeks steadily as she moved along. She went into the next room. It was a guest bedroom that was just as beautiful as the main bedroom. She dived into the queen-sized bed and pulled the lime green sheets over her body. She curled into a tight little ball and cried freely.

"Lily," a soft voice called, "please tell me what happened and come to the lounge, it wouldn't be Christmas without you."

She stiffened as a hand moved down her back, soothing her and a voice said tenderly, "You can tell me anything and I'll still love you. Please Lily."

She slowly sat up and turned to face him, her eyes red and slightly puffy and her nose running badly. She sniffed loudly.

James grinned, "That wasn't so hard, was it? So will you please tell me what's wrong now?"

He passed her a tissue he had just conjured and he smiled at her encouragingly.

"Why should I tell _you_?" she asked him once more narrowing her eyes but this time in suspicion.

He looked put out and confused for a second before he replied; "Why _not_ me? I know you well and I might be able to help you."

Lily leaned back considering. James reached out to take her hand.

She was too quick for him and pulled her hand away before he could touch it,"Hands off, Potter."

James drew back from her and leaned against the bead's headboard and he looked at her expectantly; "Tell me." This time it wasn't a question but a gentle yet firm command.

Reluctantly she explained her problem, although as she went on it became easier to talk. Nonetheless she finished feeling rather stupid.

He nodded thoughtfully when she stopped.

"And you made this wish on Christmas Eve?"

"Yes, a wish about my family," she felt strangely comfortable telling James what had happened. It made her feel almost... safe.

"Flitwick mentioned that to us in seventh year after Easter, some sort of wishing charm activated I think."

Professor Flitwick was the Charms teacher at Lily and James' old school, Hogwarts.

"He mentioned it just before the NEWTS and it wasn't taught in depth too much although he told us how it happened and how to reverse it. He also informed us that it was very rare and only if the person wishing it to happen was totally sincere would it work."

Lily was still oblivious as to what the wishing charm was all about, "Can you try to explain the whole charm better?"

"Well; if a person wishes on a star it would normally have no effect on them, but, if you are entirely sincere and if getting that wish would benefit you or teach you something important, it will sometimes work. As I said before though; it's very rare." James ran a hand through his messy hair.

"How do I get back then?" Lily asked impatiently.

He looked thoughtful, "It's not that simple, Lily. It's difficult to reverse it."

"How?" she persisted.

James sighed, almost wistfully; "You have to fully appreciate that the wish has been granted. And you won't be able to get back until whatever brought you here feels that you understand why you had to come," he smiled hesitantly, "Judging by your reaction when you first saw me that might take some time to happen."

She eyed him curiously, all her original doubts flooding back to her. 'How could I have married James?' she wondered, 'Did he force me into it?'

Lily cleared her throat. "I married you willingly, right?" she asked a little awkwardly.

"Of course," he grinned almost smugly.

It was enough. Lily could see that James Potter had not changed one bit. He still was trying to win her over with his arrogant charms.

'Well it won't work,' she told herself stubbornly.

She sighed gloomily,"You're right; I'll definitely be here for a while."

They both got dressed, Lily in the spare bedroom and James' in the main one. They silently walked into the lounge; an airy room with magical snow and real, unmelted icicles. In pride of place a huge fir tree stood; covered in tinsel and baubles. A fire was already crackling in the grate and a large pot of Floo powder stood next to the fireplace. It was just as Lily had always pictured Christmas with her family to be; perfect. James handed her a large and neatly wrapped parcel from under the Christmas tree.

"Merry Christmas, Lily," he grinned at her.

"Thanks, Potter," her own reply was far less cordial.

He turned away and lifted up a parcel addressed to him.  
It was a very strange scene and if any of the couple's friends were to have looked in on the occasion they would have thought Lily utterly insane.

Lily was slowly unwrapping things like muggle clothes (beautiful dresses and skirts) or wizarding books on charms or other subjects that interested her. She also got a silver necklace with a blue pendant and matching earrings. She silently watched James who was tearing through his pile as joyously as any five year old would. His pile had many things to do with Quidditch and also a few things like Transfiguration books. There were even a few practical joke items and of course some chocolate. He was enthusiastically thanking Lily after he opened any present from her though it was plain that she had no idea why she had bought the presents.

She actually looked as though she _hadn't_ bought them. (This was of course true although to an onlooker it would seem very strange.) Last Christmas both had been talking, teasing and laughing with each other, they also thanked and hugged one another. Although James was still rather chirpy it was obvious that he wasn't enjoying this Christmas nearly as much as he had enjoyed the last one.

As they finished unwrapping the last of the presents James vanished all the wrapping paper and smiled once more at Lily.

"Thanks for that Quidditch book, Lil; I'm going to really enjoy it."

"Thanks for all of this, Potter," her own tone was rather cold yet polite. She had loved her presents of course but she didn't know how James had managed to get things that so well fitted her personality.

'He's your husband, remember? That's how he knows,' the small voice in her head pointed out.

She still didn't like the idea of marrying Potter, even if he did seem to know her well.

"We'd better get the turkey in the oven," James called to her, "and then I can help you with preparing the rest of the food."

She looked at him inquisitively, "It's just us, right?" She was rather nervous and would prefer it if only James knew what had happened to her since yesterday.

James turned to look at her, again grinning almost mischievously "No; Sirius and Remus are coming." He seemed to be trying to be nonchalant in the hope that Lily wouldn't mind having two of his friends over too much.

Lily groaned and sank back onto the leather couch. James got up from the floor and sat down opposite her.

I know that it is still short for a chapter but at least it's longer than the last one. OK, I know I didn't include Wormtail but I really don't like him (who does?) so I'm just going to say that he's on holiday in... Albania (I really hope that there are lots of cats there)


	4. The More the Merrier

Yay!! Nice long chappie. This is one of my favourites because it has Sirius. Read and enjoy!! ; )

"WHAT? I can't act like Lily Potter that soon! They'll find out and then send me to St. Mungo's. What if they think I'm crazy?" she was hyperventilating and worrying too much.

James looked at her, eyebrows raised, "I'm sure you can do it. Remus won't comment even if you do make a mistake, he's too easygoing, and don't worry to much about Sirius... He'll just make up an excuse for you," James grinned.

Lily didn't find it funny at all. "I cannot and will not act like your wife and pretend that I love you in front of your stupid friends." She had pulled herself up to her entire height of about 1.7m (A/N: Sorry; in SA we use cm not inches) and met his gaze with an angry glare.

"Yes," he seemed to finally have had enough of Lily's insults and objections, "You will. I don't care if you insult me; I know that I deserve some of the insults because of the things I've done in Hogwarts, but when you insult my friends," now James pulled himself to his full height and since he was about 2m high he towered over Lily, "you've gone too far."

"Oh yeah? Well, guess what? They deserve it! Your entire group were always cocky snobs and you always picked on Snape and anyone else for no good reason! I hated your arrogance then and I hate it now," her hair seemed to crackle with electricity and she was scowling. Despite being obviously the weaker one in the fight she didn't back down.

"Sirius was always such an pompous, immature, flirtatious--"

"You are the one who's being immature! He's my best friend and one of your closest friends now, if you only knew it!" He folded his arms across his chest.

Lily was stubborn; "Once a jerk, always a jerk."

"HE IS NOT! HE'S--"

But what Sirius was Lily never found out because at that moment the man himself walked in. The year or so hadn't changed Sirius Black's features one bit. He was still handsome with long black hair and warm grey eyes that were now eyeing the couple curiously.

"You don't have to stop; it was just getting good and interesting," with that said, he sat down on the black leather couch and watched them both eagerly, waiting for them to continue the shouting match.

James unfolded his arms and laughed, "Padfoot! Merry Christmas, mate!"

The two embraced and then Sirius turned to Lily expectantly.

"Well?" he asked, his eyes still laughing and his smile teasing her, "Aren't you going to even say 'Merry Christmas' to poor little me?"

Lily just stood gaping at Sirius and James. James came up behind her and gave her shoulder a gentle squeeze.

"Lil isn't quite feeling herself today, Padfoot."

Lily wasn't quick enough to disguise the look of disgust that came to her face at the touch of his hand.

Sirius surveyed her plainly; "Definitely not herself Prongs;" he noted with a withering glance, "the woman clearly hates you ," he gazed at her suspiciously, "you _are_ Lily Potter, right?"

Lily was still furious with James for contradicting her about Sirius earlier, "Get off, Potter!" she jerked his hand off her shoulder.

"Okay: question answered. Who in the world is this, Prongs?" he turned to James.

"You always did have stupid nicknames;" Lily spat at them, "calling yourselves the Marauders and pulling pranks on--"

She was once again cut off. "That's quite enough, Lily," James was speaking quietly but firmly.

"Whenever you'd like to tell me what's going on..." Sirius looked at them both pointedly.

"Sorry, Padfoot," James sighed, he glanced at Lily, his next sentence was addressed to her, "I'm not going to keep a secret this big from my best friend, I know he'll found out somehow anyway."

Lily scowled but nodded.

James turned to face Sirius again with a rather pained expression on his face. "Padfoot, this isn't Lily Potter; it's Lily _Evans_. She got here by some wishing charm and--" (seeing the gleam in Sirius' eye, he hurriedly continued) "it's not like that exactly, mate. It was the charm that old Flitwick mentioned just before NEWTs started. She got here anyway and now we think that Lily Potter is stuck in 1977."

"You know how bizarre that sounds?" Sirius grinned widely, "But, of course, I believe you. If it weren't true I just know that the two of you would be in each others arms right now," he smirked, then, seeing Lily's look of disgust, he scowled, "you better not ruin this Christmas for Jamsie-boy, Evans, because if you do I'll be forced to resort to desperate measures. I have some enchanted mistletoe..." he ended with a sing-song voice.

He let the threat hang but Lily gulped; she knew what enchanted mistletoe did. It forced the people under it to kiss each other. The thought of having to kiss James made Lily shudder visibly. 'But you've probably kissed him loads of times,' the voice in her head informed her, 'he is your husband, remember?' The thoughts swirling in her mind made Lily feel distinctly ill and she couldn't help wondering again _why_ she had agreed to James Potter as her husband.

There was a rather awkward silence between them. James broke it, "I think we'd better get lunch started so we're ready when Moony arrives," he was trying to speak lightly but all three could tell that his voice was not entirely natural.

"I'll help!" Sirius excitedly walked towards the kitchen.

James rolled his eyes, "I'd better make sure that he doesn't play with the knives again."

Lily nodded sullenly and followed the two men into the kitchen. They were all busy with their wands; causing food to cut, cook and wash itself for about ten minutes.

Abruptly and suddenly Lily asked, "Why do you call each other such weird names?"

Sirius smiled broadly, "Marauders secret."

James disagreed though, "Lily _Potter_ knew before I married her and she never did tell me how she found out. I'm sure that in her past this was when I told her."

Sirius scratched his head, nearly causing one of the knives to chop off his other hand's fingers. "I suppose, but do you really think she can be trusted?"

James looked up sharply, "Yes I do! I'd trust her with my life."

"It might cost you that, or even your soul if she knows," Sirius grumbled, "the Dementors are pretty unforgiving if you hadn't noticed, Prongs."

But James was stubborn. "No, I'm sure she won't or doesn't tell. If she did; we'd already be in Azkaban."

"Fair point, Prongs. But this is getting confusing; if you trust her tell her but I really don't think that you should. What about Moony? He may never forgive you if you tell, I mean Marauders' oath you promised not to tell anyone," he looked at Lily critically, "not even your wife."

"Oh for Merlin's sake, Padfoot! Moony would understand; I mean the future her knows anyway so Moony might even bring it up during lunch."

Sirius sighed, defeated, "Fine tell her. Don't blame me if she ships us off to Azkaban."

Lily was getting agitated, "I promise I won't tell." She looked imploringly at the two men in front of her.

"You also promised on your wedding day that you would love Prongs forever," he was brusque, "You broke that promise big time," he voice was cold and made Lily shiver slightly.

"Enough, Padfoot," James interjected quietly, "I want her to know."

"Your funeral," he muttered loudly enough for only Lily to hear.

James ignored his friend's less than subtle warnings against telling Lily and started: "When Remus was about five or six he got bitten by a werewolf."

Lily gasped, "But that means..." she trailed off.

"That Remus is a werewolf," James continued, "And when he was eleven years old, Dumbledore sent him a letter to attend Hogwarts, as he did all the other students in our year. Of course, Remus' parents were reluctant to allow him to come because of his condition. They were worried he'd be a danger to fellow pupils. Dumbledore overruled them and told them that Hogwarts would change to able to accommodate a werewolf safely. That's the reason for the Whomping Willow. It hides a secret passageway to the Shrieking Shack. Remus went along the tunnel once a month to transform and of course in there he was a danger only to himself, not the rest of the school. While we were in our first year we all formed our group and by the end of the year we had figured out the truth about Remus' monthly disappearances."

Lily nodded, "That still doesn't explain why you could get sent to Azkaban," she pointed out.

"Eager to hear are we? Eager to get our husband who we promised to love no matter what in jail, huh?" Sirius was glaring suspiciously at her again.

"Sirius, for the last time, she should know!" James frowned at his friend, "As I was saying; we figured out his secret by the end of first year. And then," James paused for effect, "we decided to take matters into our own hands."

Lily was getting very interested and curious about her _husband_ now, "What did you do?" she prompted, but James needed no encouragement.

"We started to study ways in which we could help Remus make his transformations more bearable--" (seeing her look of puzzlement, he added) "It's really painful to transform into a werewolf, and since he couldn't bite humans he bit and scratched himself. Don't you remember how terrible he sometimes looked after he had been 'ill'?"

Lily frowned slightly, "Yes," she admitted slowly, "but after fifth year he always looked sleepy but not hurt."

"Ah," their was a definite twinkle in James' eyes, "That's where Peter, Sirius and I came in. In the middle of fifth year we could finally help Moony."

"How?" Lily breathed, now completely absorbed in the story.

James looked once around the room before saying, "We're Animagi."

There were about three seconds of silence before Lily yelled, "WHAT?!"

"It's a good thing your house is sound-proof, mate," Sirius commented wryly, "I think you would be in big trouble with your neighbours otherwise."

Lily was still in a state of shock, "But you aren't registered! What if the Ministry finds out? You'll get a cell in Azkaban!"

"Do I detect a hint of care for Prongs in that statement?" Sirius' eyebrows were raised.

Lily blushed slightly, "You'd both be in trouble if the Ministry finds out," she continued at a mumble.

"We know. It was worth it to help Moony, though. I turn into a stag, Peter is a rat and Padfoot here is a--"

"Dog," Sirius supplied. "James and I needed to be big to keep Moony under control during the night. It was only in fifth year that we started using the nicknames and some of my happiest memories are from running around school with those guys on full moon nights." Sirius got slightly misty eyed.

"Of course, since they invented the Wolfsbane potion to make werewolves tame during the transformation," James finished, "Moony hasn't needed us."

Lily just nodded weakly and turned back to the carrots she was chopping.

"Don't let Remus know who she is," Sirius said suddenly.

Both Lily and James looked at him curiously.

"Why not?" James ventured.

Sirius just shook his head, "I just think that nobody else should know, it will mess with time too much," he sighed and Lily could tell that his next words were hard for him to say, "and we already know that someone in the Order is passing information to Voldemort. The less anyone knows the safer you are. You know that Voldemort could use it against you."

James sighed, "I would say yes but, Lily knows nothing about being Lily Potter."

"Still," she persisted, "I agree with Sirius. Nobody else should know. Not even Remus."

"If Padfoot and I can teach you enough in time to pass it off, which I doubt," James spoke slowly and thoughtfully, "none of us will tell him, but if Lily slips up ... He'll know something is wrong and we'll tell him what."

Lily nodded a look of determination on her face, "Teach me everything I know."

Finished another one. Please review, guys!


	5. Lunch and Lessons

"Your name is Lily Potter," Sirius said slowly, clearly speaking eah word and with a completely straight face.

"Duh," was Lily's response and she raised her eyebrows and folded her arms across her chest.

Sirius ignored her complete lack of enthusiasm, "You work in the Auror department of the Ministry of Magic, Level Two along with James."

She nodded, "Who else works with us?"

"Frank Longbottom, Isabella Bristow and the Bonums (A/N: That's Latin for good; my dad told me!)," James told her quickly, "That's our squad at least, but since it's a war against Voldemort and his Death Eaters we have other squads around us. We are instructed by Mad-Eye Moody. Your worst injury was getting hit by a curse that was cured but you still sometimes get after effects."

"Like?" Lily asked desperately.

"Head aches, vomiting or moodiness. I'm pretty sure that's why you were ill yesterday," James said it all plainly and as though it was obvious and no big deal.

"What else do I need to know? Gossip or news and stuff," she looked at the two men in front of her expectantly.

"Alice is sick at the moment and all of your friends are away on vacation right now. You were sick yesterday, as I mentioned before," James continued.

"All my friends? That's like Isabella, Sydney and Alexandra, right?" she asked, "And why does it matter that Alice is sick? I mean it obviously isn't good but why are you telling me? She was two years above us and her husband, Frank was three above us!"

"Alice is now a friend of yours and you two often discuss gossip or other news at Order meetings," James told her, smiling slightly.

"What's the Order?" she was starting to feel very stupid about how much she didn't know.

"The Order of the Phoenix is an organization that fights Voldemort," Sirius told her casually, "all of us joined straight out of school."

"What do we do?" was her next question.

"Fight him," James said simply, "protect people and warn them since we have spies that can tell us about his plans."

"And what about my Auror job at the Ministry?" she was now enjoying asking the questions now and she was certainly getting more and more curious about her future.

"You and Prongs just fight the known Death Eaters when they turn up. You've also fought Voldemort three times (A/N: "_Born to those who have thrice defied him..."_)," Sirius supplied excitedly.

"What else should I know?" she was very eager now.

James opened his mouth to answer but before he could an owl swept over his shoulder and landed in an undignified heap on the kitchen table.

"Artemis!" Lily cried, it was Alexandra's owl, although she was no longer the fluffy owlet (A/N: Is that the right word?) Lily had remembered. She was a fully-grown dignified barn owl.

She ripped open the envelope tied to Artemis' claw and read; _  
Dear Lily and James_

Merry Christmas! Switzerland is beautiful at this time of year. Michael and I are learning to ski! I know you still think that Libra is too young for us to have taken her to such a cold place but for a three-month-old girl she's fine! We hope you two can make use of this.

Love, the Yorks;  
Alex  
Michael  
and Libra

Lily read it through twice before turning to James and Sirius, "Who's Libra? And is that Michael the one in the year above us?"

James nodded, "Michael York. The Muggle-born. Libra is their daughter."

Lily just gaped at him for about a few seconds before coming to her senses, "I guess that I should open this." She indicated to the rather large and squishy package tied to Artemis' scaly leg.

"Go ahead," James nodded.

Lily nimbly untied the parcel and opened it. Inside there were a matching pair of slippers, both blue although one pair was rather larger and they were obviously meant for James.

(A/N: I know; stupid. Can I blame it on tiredness?)

Lily wasn't sure why but that really seemed to make everything fall into place. Irreversibly. She groaned and sank lower on her chair.

"Why me?" she muttered sullenly.

"Awwwww, sweet! Little cuddly slippers," Sirius held up Lily's pair, "your feet must be small."

"Tiny," James said absentmindedly.

Lily glared at him, "Any other surprises? My best friend is married, has a kid and you failed to mention it?!" she suddenly looked very worried. "I don't have a child, do I?"

"No, don't worry," James soothed her. He went back to his position by the stove and continued to cook.

In the awkward silence, Sirius' mumble was perfectly audible; "It's not for lack of trying."

"PADFOOT! Will you please be more tactful!" James thundered at his best friend.

Sirius rolled his eyes, "Just the truth..."

"That's enough. Let's get back to teaching Lily, alright?" James scowled at Sirius before turning to Lily. "Isabella Tailor is now Isabella la Grange. Sydney was going out with Ben Kindrake."

"Cool! Izzy always wanted to get married when she was out of school! Are they away too? And who's Syd going out with now?" Lily was bubbly and excited about the future; it was actually pretty good, if you excused the fact that she was married to Potter...

James sighed and softly said, "She was murdered Lily, she and her sister Hannah. Some Death Eaters killed them because they had were both Unspeakables and when they were tortured they refused to talk."

"No," Lily was white-faced and shocked, realizing that the future wasn't much better than the past, "not Syd! How could it have happened?"

She buried her face in her hands and all three were silent for a few minutes, each lost in their own thoughts. James squeezed her shoulders but let go as soon as she glared at him with red-rimmed eyes.

Lily glanced up curiously, "How do they know how Sydney died?"

James looked at her straight in the eye. "Claire Midgett. You remember that she always was friends with Hannah?"

Lily nodded for him to continue. "What happened?" she repeated.

"Claire was visiting them in their apartment in Hogsmeade. Three masked Death Eaters Apparated in and since Claire was in the kitchen they didn't know she was there at first. She heard them so walked into the lounge and they put a Body-Bind on her before torturing the twins with the Cruciatus-curse (A/N: Is my spelling right?). She watched them torture and murder her best friend."  
James bowed his head sadly.

"She was shaking when the Ministry arrived and removed the Body-Bind. She just threw up and started crying. It was awful. She had nightmares for weeks afterwards, always with the same words one of the Death Eaters spoke to her before they left: 'You are lucky the Dark Lord wants you to live, Muggle-loving fool though you are.' Nobody's figured out _why_ he wants her to live though." Sirius looked very forlorn and pained as he said the last words.

Lily hesitantly asked, "I don't understand why she told you all of these details." She ventured pointedly.

Sirius sighed, "Claire needed to tell someone. You're one of her friends now Lily."

"And Padfoot here is her boyfriend," James concluded, Sirius barely even acknowledged the mention of his nickname.

"And Izzy? She's safe, right?" Lily questioned anxiously.

"Safe in Florida. She lives in France with Robby la Grange, a guy from Beauxbatons," James reassured his nervous wife.

Lily sighed. "What else?" she felt she was prepared for almost anything right now.

"The Order," the two men said simultaneously.

"You mentioned it earlier. The one that fights Voldemort?" Lily asked.

Both men nodded. James continued, "Dumbledore heads it all up. He'll assign us jobs and missions to fight Death Eaters. As Padfoot said; we've fought Voldemort as well."

"How did we do it?" Lily had an almost greedy look on her face as she asked them.

"A story for another time," (A/N: Actually I'm just a bit lazy and this will also fit a lot better in chapter... six or seven.) James evaded the question with a wave of his hand.

"Who else is in the Order?" she asked with less enthusiasm.

"Moody, Dedalus Diggle, the Longbottoms, Emmeline Vance, Benjy Fenwick, Edgar Bones, Sturgis Podmore, Caradoc Dearborn, Elphias Doge-"

"He has a really stupid hat!" Sirius cut in (A/N: Couldn't resist ; )).

James cleared his throat and continued his list, "Gideon Prewett, Hagrid, Abeforth; that's Dumbledore's brother, Dorcas Meadowes and of course Sirius, Remus, Peter and us."

Lily just gaped at him in disbelief and awe, "How did you remember all of the names?" she finally asked quietly.

Sirius stood and slung an arm around James shoulders, "Old Prongsie-boy here didn't get the most NEWTs in the year by being forgetful, Lily."

James blushed and Lily asked, "Did I get some as well?"

Sirius snorted, "You wouldn't be an Auror if you hadn't!"

Now it was Lily's turn to blush as James smiled; "You had one less than me."

"What about Mickey? She's (A/N: Sorry if McKinnon is a he but I don't have the book right now) in the Order too," Sirius glanced at James.

James sighed and as he said the next words he looked far older and tireder than his twenty years. "No Sirius, McKinnon was killed recently," he sighed loudly, "there are dangers in fighting for the Order. But some things are worth dying for."

The moment was broken out of its mystical air when the doorbell rang.

"See Sirius? Some people have manners and don't barge in on personal discussions." Lily said rolling her eyes before she glared at Sirius.

Sirius pretended to look hurt, "I'm sure I have no idea what you are talking about, Lily. And it was an argument, not a 'personal discussion'."

Remus was waiting patiently, leaning on the wall nearby. As soon as Lily opened the door she saw him and she was engulfed in a hug.

"Merry Christmas, Lily!" Remus grinned at her and held out a a rectangular package.

Lily quickly responded with her own greetings but she was slightly overwhelmed.

"I think you can already guess what I've gotten you since you've been asking for it for about a month," Remus grinned at her while they walked back towards the kitchen.

Lily was luckily saved the trouble of telling Remus she in fact had no clue what he had gotten her because James called to them to say lunch was ready.

"You're lucky to have a husband who can cook, Lily," Sirius teased her.

She nodded mutely as Remus exchanged another round of greetings with James and Sirius.

James presented Remus with a gift and Lily remembered the one in her own hands. She wondered what she had been asking for. 'Only one way to find out,' she thought as she ripped off the wrapping. Inside there was a book on Animagi. A note was tucked into the book jacket. _'I know you wanted this when you kept on insisting that you should transform with James. I think a squirrel would suit you. -Remus'_

Lily was still puzzling over why she would have wanted to be able to spend more time with James than absolutely necessary when his voice cut into her thoughts; "Lily? Would you mind setting the table?"

Lily just shrugged and headed into the dining room (A/N: She had past it on her way downstairs; that's how she knew where it was.)

"Ornatus!" she said clearly and with a flick of her wand, the table was set for four people with a chiffon blue table cloth and nuts and berries decorating the table. Silver candles were burning low around the room. She smiled in satisfaction. She was a perfectionist; that would never change.

The meal was delicious: James had done most of the work in the end and he was a Marauder which (as Sirius so humbly put it) automatically made him "good at everything". Lily was starting to really enjoy her Christmas despite having to be with the Marauders when a conversation started up.

Remus cleared his throat, "Lily, I remember you weren't feeling well yesterday, did you go for a check-up at St. Mungo's?"

Lily glanced at James who nodded quickly and responded, "yes," she lip-read James' next words, "they said they'd Floo to tell me what was wrong."

Remus nodded politely and turned to James, "Nothing to worry about then," he smiled boyishly, "since you were so worked up yesterday, Prongs."

James laughed, "How could I not be worried? Lily hadn't been sick since I married her, except for the curse side effects."

Lily tried to hide the blush creeping onto her cheeks. Potter, worried about _her_?

The rest of the lunch went smoothly until the Christmas pudding and custard were served.

"Oh yes, Lily. I forgot to ask; when are you going to teach me to make those delicious mince pies of yours?"

Lily opened her mouth and shut it again, feeling stupid, "Maybe in January sometime?" she ventured nervously, hoping that she would be back in her own time by then because she had no clue how to make the pies Remus was referring to.

"You could do it today; you have lots of time," Sirius grinned mischievously at her from behind Remus.

Lily glared at him and he quickly continued, "But I suppose not, what would poor James and I do while you cooked?"

"Play Quidditch," Remus said sarcastically, "And not today because I need to leave soon for Order work."

"On Christmas Day?" Lily frowned worriedly.

"I'll be fine, Lily, I always get back safely," Remus sighed tiredly, "Dumbledore just needs the job done soon."

"If you say so," Lily smiled thinly.

"Speaking of which, I'd better go now. Merry Christmas!" he stood and embraced them all again before he Disapparated with a loud pop.

"That wasn't so bad, was it?" Sirius was looking at her innocently.

Lily snorted and started to levitate the dirty plates to the kitchen.

A strangely long chapter. Not my best, I know but thanks for bearing with me for now. Please review anyway and I hope the next chapter will be better! If you want to say ANYTHING please do! So get reviewing!


	6. Sirius Conversations

This chapter is a bit shorter but I think that it's also a bit better than the last one. Please review and I don't mind flames!

"Really Lily; lunch went perfectly fine!" Sirius insisted as he starting to vanish the candles and tablecloth.

Lily rolled her eyes and ignored him, concentrating more on the nauseating feeling in the pit of her stomach. She felt like throwing up.

James smiled encouragingly at her, "I think we're lucky that Moony wasn't in a very talkative mood. I guess the mission is more dangerous than he let on, that's why he was so quiet."

Lily frowned, she was concerned for Remus' well-being, "I wonder what it was?"

"I need to see Dumbledore today so when I go over to him I'll ask him about Remus for you," James offered.

"I could go with and ask," Lily really didn't want James to do her any favours.

James shook his head, "I don't think you should Lily, the Healer said that she was going to Floo over to tell you your diagnosis so you need to be here."

"Alone? With Sirius? That's going to be torture," Lily whined, "and he might just hex me because he's mad at me."

"Sirius won't hex you," James said calmly.

"What makes you so sure?" Lily asked doubtfully.

"I'll make him promise not to," James said simply, "Padfoot won't if I tell him not to."

There was something about James' eyes right then that made Lily believe him and trust him completely. 'He will protect me.' The thought drifted unbidden across her mind and Lily was immediately angry at herself. 'You can't trust Black _or_ Potter.' A different voice told her stubbornly, but still, looking into James' eyes Lily almost truly believed him. Almost.

James could sense her reluctance to trust him and sighed, "You don't have to believe me."

Lily looked at him and nodded slowly, "What choice do I have? He won't go away."

"You do realize I can hear you!" Sirius said indignantly, "Lily's right; I won't leave because you promised to play Quidditch with me this evening, Prongs."

James glanced at the clock on the wall, "I think I'd better go now; Dumbledore wanted me there as soon as possible. Padfoot," he looked sternly at his best friend, "behave; no hexing Lily. No matter what," he said the last words clearly and seriously.

Sirius saluted, "I solemnly swear that I, Sirius Orion Black, will not hex Lily... um... what's your second name?"

"Lily Elizabeth Evans," James supplied and gave Sirius a look that plainly meant 'go on'.

"I will not hex Lily Elizabeth Evans today," seeing James' glare he hurriedly continued, "Or any time this week. Fine! I will not hex her at all. Are you satisfied, Prongs?"

James nodded, fetched his Invisibility Cloak (seeing it made Lily's eyes widen) and then he Disapparated soundlessly.

Lily stared at the spot where he had been. "How did he do that so quietly?" she asked, dumbfounded.

Sirius shrugged, "Practice? He got great marks in Stealth and Secrecy tests when he became an Auror."

Lily said nothing to this and walked into the lounge, Sirius trailing her. She sat down and looked at Sirius who was seated opposite her. "How does James expect me to entertain you?" she asked, not entirely politely.

Sirius shrugged and stretched back on the couch, his hands behind his head, "Talking to me."

"About what?" Lily wasn't at all interested in the answer but asked him anyway.

"We need to get something straight, Lily Evans," Sirius sat up and stared at her, completely focused  
and sincere, "you are not as great as you think you are."

Lily felt that his statement was so inadequate she couldn't help protesting, "I don't think I'm the greatest, that's Potter's job!"

Sirius glared angrily at her and spoke again, "You don't deserve him."

"I don't _want_ him," Lily pointed out.

Sirius continued in a softer voice, as though he hadn't heard her comment, "James adores you; I can see it in his eyes. You mean the world to him. If he could, he would have had you in his arms, spoiling you and just enjoying Christmas with you! That's all he wanted for today: to be with you and be able to look after you since you were ill yesterday. I knew the second I came in that something was wrong because James and you never fight like that. Prongs has always been so happy since he married you that it's creepy."

Lily didn't smile. She was breathing heavily and she shook her head in disbelief, "No."

Sirius became angry again, "Of course you wouldn't care! You're just an ungrateful brat who can't understand how lucky you are. You don't _care_ if you break his heart, as long as it doesn't hurt you. Selfishness."

Lily found her voice and said clearly, "This wasn't my choice! The last thing I'd want to do is promise James anything. How could I have married him? He must have put me under the Imperius curse."

In a second Sirius' wand was out and pointed at her, "Take that back," he hissed, his voice quiet and dangerous. "James would _never_ use the Dark Arts."

Lily glared back at him, "You promised not to hex me. I don't actually think James used the Imperius but but he must have used some mind charm."

"You're right," Sirius slowly lowered his long holly wood wand, "I promised not to _hex_ you." He promptly slapped her, not hard but enough to get Lily back to her senses.

There were two seconds of stunned silence before Lily exhaled sharply.

"I didn't ask for this, Sirius," she said quietly, "I was expecting everything in the future to be the way I wanted it to be. It's a huge shock that it isn't."

Sirius calmed down and spoke sympathetically, "I know, but whether you like it or not; _this_ is your life. Lily Potter is happy. You loved James when you married him; I promise."

"What was the wedding like?" Lily asked him curiously.

Sirius laughed, "Well, I'd prefer to tell you about _that_ than be at loggerheads. All right; I'll show you where you had it."

Lily gaped, "Right now? Is it far? I can't Apparate far away yet!"

"Calm down, it's right here, in Godric's Hollow," Sirius went to get his coat.

"Godric's Hollow? Is that where we live?" Lily was full of questions.

"Yup, it's a small village but really beautiful and peaceful. You got married in the church near the stream," Sirius starry-eyed and was far away, envisioning times passed.

Lily got out one of her coats from under the tree and wrapped it around herself. "Ready," she chirped from within the furry brown interior.

The two started to walk down the pathway and towards the setting sun. Lily was surprised to see many ornaments decorating the neighbours' lawns, some were gigantic snowmen or baubles that sparkled and lit up the entire garden.

She turned sharply to Sirius, "Is this a wizarding town?"

Sirius nodded, "Yup, or it _was_ at least, about two hundred years ago. Now a lot of the people here are Muggles but your house has been in the Potter family for centuries so James wouldn't give it up."

"I thought that Hogsmeade was the only wizarding town in England," she looked around her at the quiet houses.

"Hogsmeade is the only one without Muggles now. But Godric's Hollow was once only wizards and it's in Wales anyway. It was established by wizards, that's why it has the name but it's got Muggles and wizards here now."

"Don't the Muggles notice the magical decorations?" Lily knew the answer.

Sirius snorted, "They just think the ornaments were really expensive and well-made. If they get too curious, they get Obliviated."

Lily nodded and they continued to trudge through the soft snow.

They entered the chapel and Lily looked around in awe. It was small but still magnificent with a high ceiling and stained glass windows. The pews were had comfortable seating and it was warm inside.

"It was amazing in that July, you got married and then the reception was out by the stream. The flowers were beautiful," Sirius wasn't ashamed of sounding a bit soppy; he really had found it perfect. He had _needed_ it to be perfect, for James' sake.

"What about my dress?" Lily questioned.

Sirius leaned back on one of the pews, "That would spoil the surprise," he smirked, "besides, I'm a guy; I don't know how to describe clothes!"

A lump formed in her throat and she felt tears come to her eyes. The perfect wedding deserved the perfect bride and groom. Two people who really loved each other. 'Am I judging James too quickly?' she mentally asked herself. She remembered his actions that morning and sighed. He seemed better. Then she stopped that train of thought. James had always been a good actor. What if he was just faking caring about her. The small voice in her head cried out that she was being stupid but her stubborn streak was winning over.

She didn't even care when Sirius' voice wafted past her ear, "That was the happiest I've ever seen James."

She firmly thought 'I don't care, right?'

About half an hour later Lily was broken out of her thoughts by the sound of footsteps.

James came in, he wore a coat similar to Lily's and tiny snowflakes were all over his messy hair and eyelashes.

'He's so handsome,' the thought came to her before she could stop it and her stomach gave another sickening lurch.

He grinned, "If you're going to play hide and seek, you might want to pick a less predictable place, Padfoot."

'He looks so cute when he smiles,' the thought came suddenly and it scared Lily.

"We were just looking around, Lily was interested in seeing more of the village," Sirius told James. "We were also talking."

"I found it interesting but I think I should go home soon in case St. Mungo's tries to Floo over and I'm not home," Lily said rising. She felt slightly awkward being with James. Her conflicting emotions had yet to decide if he was, well, a good man. She knew that "good man" wasn't a good way to describe it but... she shook her head in agitation. It didn't make sense.

James followed Lily with his eyes as she picked up her coat and left. He sighed and sank back in his seat, "She's so beautiful, Padfoot."

Sirius rolled his eyes, making sure James didn't see. "And her temper is ugly."

James chuckled, "I can win her round. I know I can. I did it before so I can do it again."

"When did she start going out with you?" Sirius asked James.

"January in our seventh year," his face fell and he slowly whispered, "no, it can't be. Do you know what that means, Padfoot?"

Sirius shrugged, "That she started liking you after this whole Christmas thing."

"Exactly! She must have started liking me while she was here!" James looked excited, "It does work, she does get back!"

"How do you know that it wasn't Lily Potter who went out with you?" Sirius asked James.

James looked serious, "I suppose it could have been. I wonder if I married Lily Potter or Lily Evans."

"You are confusing me, Prongs!" Sirius put his hands over his ears.

James laughed, "I'm confusing myself too! Let's talk about something else. What did you and Lily talk about?"

Sirius decided that honesty was the best option, "You. She was wondering how she could have married you." He hesitated before adding, "She thought you might have used an Unforgivable to make her."

James paled slightly but nodded, "You told her I didn't, right?"

Sirius nodded and continued casually, "And slapped her. She deserved it."

Colour rushed to James cheeks. He slapped Sirius, "You promised not to hurt her!"

"Tsk, tsk. I promised not to hex her, and I didn't," Sirius folded his arms across his chest.

"I don't care, if you hurt my wife, you hurt me. This isn't her fault, Padfoot. And I still love her even though she isn't who she normally is. Please, just leave her alone," James looked at Sirius with a pleading look in his eyes.

Sirius sighed and slowly nodded, "You know I can't resist that begging face!" Then he grinned, "You have a good aim, Prongs. That slap really hurt!" He rubbed his cheek.

James bit back a smile, "I can't quite truthfully say that I'm sorry about it. Just don't do that again. Agreed?"

"Sure, anything to keep my face in one piece! I'm thankful you didn't decide to _hex_ me. But seriously, Prongs; I won't," Sirius laughed and Conjured an ice pack to put on his face, "No hard feelings, of course."

James grinned innocently at his best friend, "Of course not."

So, what do you think? Better, worse? Please tell me in a review!

I know that Lily and James have probably already heard the prophecy (OotP says so) but in this story they haven't. Sorry. I may include them hearing it later in the fic.


	7. Hope and Memory

Thanks to all the reviewers! You guys are the best. I found this chapter hard to write so I hope it was worth it!

The two young men walked into the frosted meadow behind the little church. James immediately headed towards the willow, remembering that night over a year ago...

(A/N: This is sort of a flashback.)

The April spring breeze whistled past their ears and the willow that swept over them swayed in the wind. The leaves crackled but other than that, the place was silent and watchful. James Potter sighed anxiously and leaned back against the tree trunk. Next to him, Lily Evans smiled. She could tell he was preoccupied and she saw his nervousness. He fidgeted for about the fifth time and Lily started to laugh.

"James, you never get nervous, so what's the matter?" Lily asked teasingly.

He was silent for a moment. "I'm thinking about the future."

His words made Lily smile. She knew about her future (A/N: Remember this is after her whole Christmas thing). She was prepared for it. There were things she couldn't tell James.Yet.

"About your job?" Lily asked. They had one term of school left and James had already been accepted at the Auror department of the Ministry of Magic. After extra training, he would be an Auror. Lily knew she would get in too but hadn't got her official letter about it yet.

"No," he said softly, "about more important things."

Lily raised her eyebrows quizzically, "Like what?"

James grinned at her, "You."

Lily was surprised but she understood. "Must be a very boring thought," she joked.

There was a comfortable silence for about five seconds.

James nervously broke it, "Lily Evans, will you marry me?"

The question caught Lily off her guard, although she had known he would ask one day she hadn't expected it right now. So soon after they got together.

"Of course. I'd be an idiot if I said no," she laughed.

James took her right hand in his left and gently slid an engagement ring on. It was gold with a blue stone set in it.

James grinned as he wrapped his arms around her. "I must be the luckiest man in the world."

Lily smiled, remembering how he said that to her at Christmas time as well. "No," she breathed before he gently kissed her cheek, "I'm the luckiest woman in the world."

James smiled at the memory. He had walked into Sirius' bedroom later that night and had gone completely crazy with joy. He remembered bouncing all over Sirius' bed.

Sirius glanced at his friend, who had become quiet. He saw the familiar goofy smile on James' face and shook his head. A small white flower was in James' hands. How Prongs had become so attached to Lily was beyond him. He remembered finding out that the two were engaged...

(A/N: Flashback thing again)

"PADFOOT!" James bellowed at the door of Sirius' room.

Sirius sat up in bed, looking at his watch and he groaned. Three in the morning? Although Sirius liked staying up late usually he wasn't really in the mood today after dealing with Remus alone last full moon. Moony had been rather anxious and Sirius had had a difficult time controlling him since James had been away at a Heads' meeting with _Lily_. They had been talking about the Easter holidays afterwards and making plans to see each other. Sirius liked Lily enough but he hated the fact that he and the rest of the Marauders had to share Prongs with her. She was taking up a lot of his time. Sirius wondered how long the relationship would last. He shook himself as he went to undo the locking charm on the door, thanking James' parents for making the house sound-proof. He didn't want to have to deal with angry neighbours.

"Yes, Prongs?" Sirius said sleepily, "What is it?"

His best friend engulfed him in a huge hug. "I did it."

"Did _what_?" Sirius rubbed his eyes.

"Asked Lily," James said cheerfully.

"That's nice, can I go back to bed now?" Sirius yawned.

"Don't you want to know what she said?" James asked incredulously.

"What did you ask her?" Sirius was trying to be polite but he was really tired...

"To marry me, of course," James rolled his eyes and sat on Sirius' bed.

Sirius was immediately fully awake. "You _didn't_," he whispered, astonished.

James nodded, "I did."

Sirius was shocked. He thought they weren't serious in the relationship. Apparently he was wrong. "But that's an important commitment, Prongs. Like forever."

"I know. That's why I did it. I want to be with Lily forever," his eyes were starry, "I don't want another guy to get her. I want to protect her and to wake up and see her next to me in the morning. To learn more about her and-"

Sirius thought it was getting a bit soppy so he quickly cut in, "What did she say?" He knew the answer by the scream James gave. Or perhaps it was the cartwheels that convinced him. His best friend was getting married.

When they entered the house they could hear muffled sobs coming from the lounge. They followed the noise and found Lily, hands over her eyes and tears streaming down her white cheeks. Sirius looked uncomfortable and mumbled something about getting tea ready before he strode down the hall and back into the kitchen. James knew he felt awkward with crying girls.

James slowly walked towards Lily, not wanting to startle her. He laid a hand on her shoulder and she jumped slightly. He sat down next to her and squeezed her shoulders protectively. She didn't protest. James sighed, thinking that comforting someone twice in one day really wasn't something he had imagined himself doing for Christmas. All the same, he knew his duty as a husband and he soothed her until she felt ready to talk. Sirius was taking a long time with the tea and James suspected that he was purposely going slowly to avoid the tension.

"Are you all right now?" James asked Lily gently as she wiped at her eyes again.

Lily shook her head, still trembling. James started to remove his arm from around her shoulders and she stiffened when she realized it was there.

He politely put his hands at his sides and looked at her directly, "I don't need to say this again, Lily. Tell me," James had a pleading look on his face and Lily knew how much he wanted to know.

"The Healer came," she said softly glancing at James. Lily was silent for about three seconds before she whispered, "I'm pregnant."

(A/N: And I'm sure you all saw _that _coming. LOL; lots of you told me in reviews!)

As Lily stretched out under the comforter in the spare bedroom that night, she reviewed the day. It had certainly been the strangest and most eventful day of her life but somehow, despite telling herself she shouldn't, she had enjoyed it. A lot. And the Healer's visit? It had been eventful...

(A/N: Another sort of a flashback.)

Lily had walked home quickly through the snow, easily finding her way back to the house. She slammed the door shut and took off her boots and coat. After hanging them up she walked into the lounge and collapsed onto the leather couch, thinking over the things that Sirius had said.

She stared absent-mindedly into the fireplace and to her surprise, she found it staring back. A woman was materializing in the flames and then, she stepped out. In the flickering light of the flames her pale face was ghostly and it took Lily a second to realize that she was just the Healer.

"Merry Christmas," Lily said politely to the woman and patted the seat of the couch next to her, "please sit."

"Thank you, Merry Christmas," she sank back onto the couch and looked at Lily appraisingly, "You were right," she said simply.

"I was right about what?" Lily asked, feeling rather idiotic.

"You don't remember? Well, given your condition I suppose you wouldn't remember what you said," The woman drew a breath and sat up, rather smugly, "It is my duty to re-inform you then."

Lily nodded, knowing full well that the only reason she didn't know was because she had arrived only that morning. She bit her lip nervously. She didn't like the way the Healer had said "condition."

"Yesterday, you came to St. Mungo's for a check-up. You told us what you suspected was the matter and warned us not to tell your husband," the Healer paused for breath.

Lily felt her heart beat faster, why had she said to not tell James? Had she been worried about what he'd say? Or do?

"So," the woman continued pompously, "we checked you over and came to our conclusion: Mrs Potter, you're pregnant. Due at the end of July."

If the Healer had expected Lily to rejoice and yell triumphantly or anything of that sort, she was sorely disappointed.

Lily just nodded numbly and said quietly, "Thank you."

The Healer sensed tension and so she hurriedly wished Lily a Happy New Year and left.

Lily was alone, thinking through the situation. She was worried, why hadn't she wanted them to tell James? A nasty thought struck her. 'Was it because I was afraid he'd... _reject_ me?' Now that the idea had come up, she thought harder and the more she did the clearer it became: James wasn't going to like this, why else would Lily Potter have wanted it to be secret? He would probably leave her. She knew that he feared commitment and a child was pretty much a permanent thing. It required time and energy, even though it would grow up. Her heart speeded up. A baby. 'Now I know how Mary felt,' she thought ruefully (A/N: Did that make sense?). But a baby. With James _Potter_. It was ludicrous, almost. She turned back to her original thought as the door slammed, announcing the return of Sirius and her husband. 'The husband that would soon leave her,' she couldn't help thinking.

The tears came, she was scared. When she was kicked out, where would she go? Her friends were all away, and she couldn't get back to her real time... Then she thought of Lily Potter; she would arrive back and be homeless! Fear kept licking at her, making the tears continue to flow.

She felt a warm hand on her shoulder and she jumped slightly, despite knowing it was James'. She didn't look up or flinch at it. What was the point? In a few minutes she'd probably be out of here anyway. As his arm crept around her and squeezed her, Lily felt a slight jolt in her stomach. She actually wished that she wouldn't have to leave. He continued to soothe her and finally talked to her.

"Are you all right?" he asked gently.

She shook her head numbly and stiffened as he removed his arm. It had been comforting and she knew that he was going to want her to talk soon. She was dreading that.

Fear licked her insides as he said, "I don't need to say this again, Lily. Tell me." His voice was gentle and reassuring, with a slight wheedling tone but Lily still felt sick with anxiety.

'You don't like Potter anyway, she reminded herself, do you?' she told herself, trying to get up the nerve to tell him. She wasn't convinced but told him anyway. "The Healer came," she said softly. "I'm pregnant."

Lily knew that it was the end. She had just ruined her future self's life. She closed her eyes preparing to be ridiculed and thrown out, after all, hadn't James been like that in fifth and sixth year? A bully. Scared of any promises and uncaring towards others. She felt like she was ready to throw up now, the unbiased part of herself had actually started to like him. She shivered, waiting for the blow to fall.

She waited for him to say something. To kick her out or mock her. He didn't. She sneaked a peek at him, expecting a scowl. He was smiling. Was he _happy_ that he was going to throw her out?

An ear-splitting scream filled the room. Never mind. She didn't know what to expect but certainly not James jumping up and down, looking ten times as excited as he had that morning. Watching a grown man behave like that was a mixture between frightening and entertaining. He started pumping the air with his fists and Lily was strongly reminded of the time Gryffindor had won the Quidditch Cup in their sixth year. Except James looked far more joyful now.

"I can't believe it (yes). I'm going to be a father (yes). This is the best Christmas present ever! (yes) I can't wait (yes, yes, yes!)" James was shouting, not caring who heard or saw him. Tears of joy streamed down his cheeks and he laughed.

"I claim godfather!" Sirius rushed in (without any tea) and joined James in shouting "Yes!"

Lily was confused but relieved. After about five minutes when they had both calmed down, James sat back again next to Lily. His eyes were shining. "This is so great."

"Remember I told you about him being excited on his wedding day, Lily? Well, I think he just managed to put in a good encore. I really think it's a good thing you house is sound-proof," Sirius leaned back, grinning mischievously. "When are you due?"

Lily was still in a state of shock. "July," she muttered.

Of course, James couldn't keep the smile off his face. "I told you, Padfoot. One day my dream would come true. You just never believed me."

Sirius snorted, "You told me in second year that you would marry Lily Evans and have a family with her. Pardon me for not believing you but at that time Lily hated you."

James shrugged. "I'm the luckiest man in the world," James said (he was remembering his words from so many years ago).

Sirius smirked, "You're only twenty (A/N: yes, his birthday's in September 1959, so his school story is like Hermione's. He was 11 then he turned 12 at school.) and you already have a wife and soon a child. What's the rush?"

James laughed, "You know me well enough by now to know that I have no patience, Padfoot!"

Lily found her voice. "I don't understand," she said quietly.

Sirius and James turned to look at her. James gave Sirius a hard look and he got up and Disapparated.

"What don't you understand?" he asked sympathetically.

"Why don't you hate me because of this? You were always scared of commitment," Lily didn't look up and so she didn't see the hurt look in his eyes.

"I could never hate you," he told her simply. "When we got married we both agreed we wanted a family. This is our dream."

"I didn't have anything to do with this baby," Lily continued, "I was scared you'd leave me if you found out."

James shook his head slowly, "I'll never leave you." He lifted up her left hand and pointed to the ring, "Remember what it stands for. I love you and I won't hurt you. That's forever. I promise."

She smiled as she finished remembering. The unbiased part of her completely loved him. But there was a stubborn streak in her, mistrusting and suspicious. She still wasn't sure, it had only been one day. She twirled the ring around her finger, not thinking over everything.

She grinned as she thought about it. In spite of everything it really had been the best Christmas ever. Lily turned her thoughts to the baby. It felt weird to think that she was pregnant, and since the time change had happened, that Lily Potter had already known about it before leaving. She rubbed her abdomen absent-mindedly, surprised to suddenly realize that she was carrying James Potter's child. It scared her. She decided to not think too much about it, to avoid feeling sick again.

James stood on the threshold of the guest bedroom, watching his wife's form sleep. The moonlight shone on her face, making it pale and making her hair shine bright in contrast. She was so perfect as she slept, peaceful and relaxed. He had been the one to suggest that she sleep in the guest bedroom, knowing that she would hate the idea of sharing the main bed with him. He smiled ruefully as her small hand moved down onto her abdomen and she protectively covered it. She was looking after his child. His child! He was still overjoyed, finally he could have a family of his own. He walked along the hall to his own bedroom, quietly changing and getting into bed. His smile faded as he realized he would be alone tonight.

My longest chappie yet! It was hard to write because I'm terrible at writing emotions nicely. Oh well. I hope it wasn't too confusing. Please review! And I promise the next chappie has some explanations about time travel. I don't mind flames but please no bad language!


	8. Getting Too Old

This was definitely not well-written. It's just an explanation. Hope it clears stuff up!

Lily Potter felt something tickling the back of her neck. 'Must be James,' she thought sleepily.

"Merry Christmas, Lily!" she head her mother's voice saying. Then she remembered.

Two years ago she had gone into the future and spent time with her future husband. Lily smiled at the memory. Poor James! They had speculated that she had come to the past while her seventeen-year-old self was in the future. They had been correct, apparently.

She sighed as she swung her legs down over the side of her bed. The bed creaked and Lily felt the seams on her pyjama bottoms stretch slightly.

She had been preparing herself for this last night. She had debated whether or not to warn James but decided against; it was rather confusing and besides, her husband loved surprises. Her husband. Her husband! She absolutely loved her life with James and thought that he was the most perfect guy she could have ended up with. But she remembered that she hadn't seen it that way at the beginning of seventh year. Of course, she had known she was pregnant but she knew that if it hadn't been for the baby, she probably wouldn't have fallen in love with James. That wasn't the only thing that changed her mind, obviously but she knew that it had changed her terrible opinion of him a lot. The thing that had made her truly certain that she loved him was That. Lily didn't like recalling the memory and had almost told James that it was going to happen so that he could put a stop to it, so it never happened. But she hadn't; she knew how important it had been to make her see James clearly. To see that he loved her.

Her dad poked his head around her door; "Morning, sleepy-head. Merry Christmas!"

He engulfed her in a hug and Lily smiled to herself, tears forming in her eyes. In her future, they were both dead, killed in a car accident. Lily never saw Petunia since the two sisters were not on good terms. Her life was with James and he was closer to her than any family.

She closed the door as her father left, charming some clothes on and then sending her friends' presents to them. She smiled at the irony; she had been waiting to do this for about two years. She looked at herself in the mirror. She was young and innocent in this body. She was Lily Evans, not Lily Potter who had fought Voldemort and lived. Innocent little Lily Evans who (annoyingly) hated James.

She had wanted to spend Christmas with James so much; life wasn't fair! She seriously debated owling him and asking if she could go to his house. She decided against it; she didn't want people to think she sick, it would only draw attention to herself and she wanted it to be kept secret that she was Mrs. Potter. She sighed, thinking about today would bring. Vernon Dursley; her sister's future husband. The urge to owl James was even stronger.

A tawny owl came fluttering in through the window. Lily smiled as she recognized it. "Hello, Merlin." It was James' owl.

A small parcel was tied around his legs and Lily carefully removed it. The note on top of it read: "Dear Lily, Please don't throw this away! I just wanted to say 'Merry Christmas'. You don't have to respond but I wanted you to know that I care. I've changed for you, Lily. Please give me a chance. -James. PS. I love you."

"And I love you, too," Lily said sadly and opened the parcel. She knew what was inside because when she had gotten back from the future, she had been wearing it. A beautiful charm bracelet with charmed charms that sparkled in different colours. She put it on, smiling ruefully. She knew she couldn't reply, as much as she wanted to.

"So, Petunia tells me that you work at Grunnings," Mr Evans said politely to Vernon, "Do you enjoy your job?"

"Yes, we make drills and I have to take orders..." Vernon droned on.

Lily tuned him out. She had seen him enough to know that drills were his favourite subject and that he could go on for ages. She studied her lunch, thinking about James' meals and how excited he always was at Christmas. Her last Christmas had been the best in her life. Now she felt lonely.

The topic turned towards Petunia and Lily caught a snippet.

"... Petunia is the first of our girls to have a boyfriend."

"Nobody will ever love Lily, mother, she's too strange."

Lily snorted, who was James then? 'The love of your life, your husband, best friend-'

"Lily?" Her mother looked at her strangely, "Are you alright, dear?"

She was tempted to shake her head but she nodded anyway. This was going to be a long day.

She had opened her presents earlier that morning; thinking jealously of Lily Evans, who got to see James reaction from all _her_ hard work, present picking and wrapping. And all the stuff she was getting! This attitude put Lily in a rather bad mood.

She finally sat back on her bed, wishing that it was her soft one in Godric's Hollow. She sighed as she turned over onto her side, feeling cold through the thin blanket. The pyjamas had been loosened with a charm. Lily laid a hand over her abdomen, thinking about her family. Her real family in Godric's Hollow. She felt alone. Lily thought over her day again. She remembered tea time when Petunia had mentioned Lily's "stupid" secret admirer who didn't actually like her but was just annoying her. Lily knew it was a lie and she could stand Petunia insulting her but she wished that Petunia wouldn't mention such a painful subject. She had grown angry, accidentally turning Petunia's teacup into a rat. She had quickly changed it back but not in time to avoid seeing the scared look on her sister's face. Vernon had been in the bathroom so had thankfully missed the ordeal.

She shivered again, turning instinctively to her left, where James would normally be. She wanted to feel his warm arms around her, telling her it was going to be fine. She was met with the rustling of the breeze. She groaned; she would be alone tonight.

I know: short. It was really more of an explanation than anything but I tried to make it interesting. Please review anyway!

Question: Who is Mr Figg and what is his significance? (Answer in a review, please!)


	9. Black Hearted

I don't know; does this chapter make it to PG-13? Please can someone tell me! And this chapter was hard to write so I hope you appreciate it. Sorry to all the Sirius fans out there for the way he's acting. I really like Sirius but I need someone to be that way and he's the best one for the job coz he's James' best friend. I'm sorry it's late you guys!

Lily Evans rolled onto her side and sleepily rubbed her eyes. She saw green all around her and she frowned; it hadn't been a dream that she was Mrs Potter. A nauseous feeling starting building up in her stomach. She ran to the bathroom and promptly threw up. She glanced at the mirror as she stood. She was pale and black rings were around her eyes. She was relieved that nobody could see her now. She felt another bout of nausea and leaned over. James chose that moment to appear, tousled and sleepy in the bathroom. He was on his knees at her side in a second. He squeezed her hand gently, smiling encouragingly. Lily felt her stomach flutter, but she was sure it wasn't just the sickness.

"Morning sickness is the pits," she grumbled as she stood again, leaning slightly on James for support. They started to walk down the stairs.

"I'm sorry," James smiled apologetically at her. "I know it's my fault, partly."

Lily gave him a withering glance, "Why did you get up?"

"You're my wife and I love you. Besides it's the least I can do."

James normally hated showing anybody his feelings except for Sirius and Lily Potter. He didn't mind showing Lily Evans though, he knew that this was the time that had caused Lily to fall in love with him and he had to show her who he really was. It was worth it.

"You're not as bad now as you were while we were at school," Lily told him carefully.

"I'll take that as a compliment," James grinned at her.

"I mean, no offence, but you're still not my first choice as a husband, but a good friend would be okay," Lily said quickly.

James' heart sank slightly; he really wanted Lily to understand that he loved her but, on the other hand; friends was better than enemies. "Truce?"

"Of course, James," Lily smiled nervously. "But-"

"Sirius won't bother about it if you don't really want to be at truce with him," James assured her.

"How did you know I was going to say that?" Lily laughed.

"I just know. I'm your husband," James shrugged.

"Just know? That doesn't make sense," Lily shook her head.

James looked thoughtful, "No, love doesn't make sense."

Lily smiled weakly at him and sat back on the couch. "Sixth sense." Seeing James' confused expression she quickly added, "Muggle thing." (A/N: I know the movie wasn't out then but people still knew about stuff like that back then).

The two started talking and continued for about an hour. Lily found James really easy to talk to and he had a great sense of humour. She couldn't help staring at him once in a while; he was so good looking.

A clock chimed somewhere and James looked at his watch, doing a double take, "Oh Merlin, I have to meet Dumbledore in five minutes!"

"Again?" Lily couldn't hide her disappointment.

James nodded sadly, "Order business. I think I'll be back at about two."

"That's five hours away!" Lily gasped.

"I'll try make it earlier but Dumbledore said it was urgent. He wanted me to bring you but I told him you were sick. It's going to be dangerous."

Lily sighed, she knew that she wasn't ready to take on Death Eaters or anybody in this condition. "Good luck."

James grinned and he risked kissing her cheek before Disapparating silently away. He left Lily's head spinning. She couldn't deny she liked the attention... 'But this is Potter,' she reminded herself, 'potential friend but not a husband.' But her heart was beginning to have second thoughts.

Lily slowly made her way upstairs and picked up one of the Charms books she had gotten for Christmas. It didn't distract her from her emotions and confusion. She didn't know what to think about James Potter. He was the same man but he had grown up. She just hoped the change was permanent. She lay back on her soft bed, feeling slightly out of place. It wasn't that she didn't like the room but it wasn't a perfect as the main bedroom. Smiling to herself, Lily got up and walked into the main room, gently falling onto her side of the bed. Now she was comfortable.

She read for about an hour and was completely absorbed when she was shaken out of her thoughts by a loud crack. It had come from downstairs, it sounded like somebody Apparating. Lily cautiously felt for her wand and made her way downstairs. She knew it wasn't James down there because he Apparated silently and this sound was loud. She felt something trip her and heard a bark-like laugh as she stumbled. Sirius whipped off the Invisibility Cloak and grinned at her.

"Hi, Lil," he said with a completely straight face.

He endured a minute of Lily telling him not to sneak up on people like that before he interrupted: "Where's Prongs?"

"Doing something for Dumbledore,"Lily said grumpily.

"Too bad, I brought the mistletoe. Anyway, I came to return this," he placed the Cloak in Lily's hands, "It's James', he lent it to me last week."

Lily nodded as she held it up, "This explains a lot."

Sirius smiled, "Potter heirloom; your kid will get it one day."

Lily grimaced but said politely, "Do you want a drink? James won't be back for a while."

Sirius shook his head, "Thanks, but I have to go; Moony and I are going to play Quidditch together for a bit."

"Later, maybe?" she was anxious to appear friendly to avoid Sirius getting angry at her again.

"Maybe," Sirius shrugged and Disapparated loudly.

Lily made her way back up to the bedroom, her heart still pounding with the shock. She calmed down as soon as she entered; there seemed to be a certain peace in the room. She smiled to herself and resumed reading.

An hour later, another pop echoed around the house. Sirius must be back. Lily put down her book and walked out the room, leaving her wand on the bedside table. She went down the stairs, "Is that you, Sirius?"

No answer.

"Are you trying to scare me again?"

More silence. Lily started to turn her back on the room and walk back upstairs, thinking she must have heard wrong.

"Locomotor Mortis!" a voice shouted from the doorway of the kitchen

Lily's legs sprang together and she fell backwards. She tried to get up but a foot came down on her shoulder. She glared upwards at the man. She screamed at him, not from fear but anger. Why had she been off her guard.

"No need to make a noise, little mudblood, your house is sound-proof. Nobody can hear you scream," the Death Eater jeered.

"Black! You coward! Hitting someone with a spell from behind is unfair," she spat at him.

Regulus Black laughed, "Why should I fight fair? I've heard enough; Petrificus Totalus!"

Lily couldn't move or speak but a few tears of frustration formed. Why had she been so off her guard? She should have known better.

Regulus twirled his wand between his fingers, his face gaunt and pale, "The Dark Lord is getting tired of your attempts to vanquish him. It's my job to get rid of you before you cause more trouble." He stuck his nose in the air, "Potter can't save you now, you'll be dead long before he gets back."

Lily's eyes widened, if she died, what would happen to Lily Potter? How could she die if Lily Potter existed? What was going on?

Regulus knelt beside her, "And yet, you are a beautiful mudblood. It seems almost a shame. He fondled her hair, like James had done the morning before.

Lily felt disgusted that he was touching her. When James had touched her she had felt loved and cherished but with Regulus she felt dirty. She realized now; she cared about James, she didn't hate him. He respected her and she admired that. 'And now I can never tell him,' Lily thought sadly.

"Pity," he murmured as he lifted his wand, pointing it to her heart, "Avada Ked-"

A fist connected with the side of his face, making him land sprawled across the floor.

James pointed his wand at Regulus' heart, "Keep your hands off my wife."

Lily felt her heart melt with relief. James.

James mouth was set in a scowl as he looked at Regulus, "Get out of here and tell Voldemort-"

Regulus flinched.

"that we're not scared of him," James said angrily, "get out before I jinx you."

Regulus stayed on the ground white faced.

James muttered something and Regulus was turned into a rat.

"Get out," he said again and the rat scurried out under the doorway. James whispered something, pointing to the ceiling of the house with his wand, an Anti-Apparation jinx.

He knelt down next to Lily, "Finite Incantatem."

Lily sat up and James took her into his arms. She didn't cry and didn't speak and James just held her close, comforting her.

"I'm sorry," Lily finally whispered as they broke apart, "I feel so stupid."

James stroked her face, "You're just stubborn, I know you're smart."

Lily shook her head mutely, "I wish I had given you a chance sooner."

James shrugged, "Don't worry about it too much, Angel."

Lily smiled at the name, "How did you know I was in trouble?"

James looked at her, "I'm your husband. I could feel your fear."

Lily felt a tear on her cheek, and she smiled ruefully, "Like this morning, huh?"

He nodded, touching her hair.

Lily liked the feeling, she didn't feel sickened by him at all, "Thanks, James. I owe you so much."

She tried to stand but felt a bit unsteady. She swayed and James caught her before she fell.

"Regulus attacked a pregnant women. He almost killed my entire family," James looked ready to kill.

"But he didn't because you came in time. You saved our lives," Lily looked at him admiringly.

"I couldn't let him kill you," James said simply, "I love you."

"I love you, too," Lily said the words James had wished she would say for so long.

He half supported and half carried Lily to her room, gently rubbing her back.

He gently laid her down on the green bed, "You need to rest for a bit."

Lily nodded, "Are you going back to Dumbledore now?"

James shook his head, "I'll Floo him and explain what happened. I won't leave you again."

Lily smiled as she turned over onto her side to sleep, feeling safe and protected. It had been a busy day and even a bit scary but it had helped her realize something important. Something very important.

There: done. Not a very long chapter but SO difficult! I'd really appreciate any reviews. I think the next chapter will be the last or second to last. Thanx 2 all my reviewers!

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Question: What if Lily was pregnant with her _second_ child on 31 October 1981? (Plz answer in a review!) 


	10. Going Home

Lily (Potter) yawned and stretched. In a house on Greenbird Road. Again. She fell back onto her pillows, feeling annoyed. It was going to be a long day... It was Boxing Day and she knew that she was facing another long and frustrating day without her best friend. This put her in a bad mood and she was on the point of Apparating to her real home before she heard a noise behind her. It was a soft crack. She looked and saw nothing. Her year with James should have taught her to be cautious and wary. It hadn't and she sat back on her bed.

"Morning, Lily," the bed chirped pleasantly. Wait.

She turned around a pulled the Invisibility Cloak off of James Potter. She narrowed her eyes and tried not to smile. She tried not to think of him as her husband. That would make her act out of Lily Evans' character. One look into those hazel eyes and Lily felt comforted. He was there, that was what mattered. Her eyes filled with tears as he kissed her and she woke up from the dream.

Another frustrating and realistic dream. Another almost. She was getting really tired of Lily Evans' life. She wanted to go home!

Lily Evans smiled as she woke up on the 27th. Another day. Then she felt the familiar nausea and groaned as she walked to the bathroom. One thing she wouldn't miss was morning sickness. As usual, James sat with her and squeezed her hand. He looked so guilty and apologetic as she stood that she had to laugh.

"You look so funny when you do that," she commented.

"I'm just really sorry," he told her honestly.

"Tell that to your wife," she said, "she's the one whose going to struggle the most."

James' face turned white and he looked scared, "I don't know what I'd do if anything happened to her."

Lily nodded, "I can understand that now. I'm sorry about before."

James smiled weakly, "It's in the past."

Lily smiled at the irony. "Why do you love her?" she asked suddenly, speaking in third person.

A familiar smile crossed James' face, "How can I not?" He told her.

"And how could she not love you?" Lily sighed to herself, "She must be so stupid."

James glanced at her as he sat down on the couch. She looked worried and alone. He wanted to help but how could he if she didn't tell him how? He looked into the emerald eyes that he had loved for so long and realized something: being there was a comfort.

"I don't know why you kept loving me when I was so terrible to you, but whatever it was that made you do it; it's powerful," she said softly.

James nodded, as he leaned over her. "I think it's time you went back," he said softly.

Lily looked at him in confusion, "How do you know?"

"Call it sixth sense," he smiled as he kissed her cheek.

Lily felt giddy and her heart speeded up. She felt the world sliding, as though she was Apparating and as she blinked she was on her bed in Greenbird Road. Alone. "I love you," she whispered, her voice getting lost in the wind. "You don't know how much."

Lily Potter felt the familiar feeling of sliding and braced herself. She was going home. She arrived back giddily where she belonged.

Her husband grinned down at her, "Welcome back, Angel."

The rest of Lily Evans' holiday passed uneventfully and she missed talking to James and missed her comfortable bed in Godric's Hollow. Finally, it was time to return to school, on the 9th of January. She pushed her trolley determinedly towards the barrier and was licked onto Platform 9¾. She saw the familiar steam train and all her peers. She saw her husband and felt lonely again. She debated whether or not to run into his arms but decided against it. She settled for staring at him mournfully.

"Lily!" Sydney cried out to her. "Any good reason you're staring longingly at your worst enemy?"

Lily looked at her friend. "Hi Syd," she said, trying not to think about losing her.

"Any good reason?" Syd persisted.

Lily wiggled her eyebrows suggestively, "We'll see about that."

Sydney grinned as she led Lily to an apartment. "Thanks for the Christmas present, by the way."

Lily grinned, still thinking of a messy-haired Marauder, "My pleasure." It was a good thing Sydney didn't ask more questions...

The girls chatted enthusiastically on their way to Hogwarts, Lily half listening. Just before the train came to a stop, the Marauders came into their apartment. James looked around nervously and made his way over to Lily.

Lily smiled to herself as she pulled his hand through his hair nervously, "Hi Lily. Um... I wanted to ask you if you wanted to come to Hogsmeade with me next week."

His face was pink and he looked very anxious.

Lily pretended to think about it. After ten seconds of absolute silence, with every eye on Lily, she spoke, "Sure, I'd love to."

Every jaw dropped, eyes widened as she smiled up at him, "Really?" James looked completely shocked.

"Some things you just can't explain. Some things you can," Lily shrugged.

James just smiled, "That was cryptic."

Lily smirked back, feeling a sense of peace, "You'll understand one day."

And that's the end! You guys have been great with reviews so far so please can you review one last time.


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